Bank Holiday in lockdown  (tune: The Teddy Bears’ Picnic)

If you go down to the woods today

you’re in for a big surprise;

there’s lots of notices on display

regarding your chicken thighs.

You must not grill them under the trees

and eat them there with salad and cheese –

today’s the day you really can’t have a picnic.


Picnic time has now been banned,

so kindly understand

you cannot enjoy a barbecue;

take your camp-stoves to the shops,

and cook your burgers in the trolley queue.

As the line creeps near the door,

the chops and sausages will nourish the waiting crowd;

at six o’clock, the store will be closing

so do your trolley dash,

then drink at home, while it’s still allowed.


If every family in the land

embraces this social rule,

to keep our distance and wash our hands,

we’ll get back to work and school.

So even when the weather is warm

to stay at home will keep us from harm,

until the day we really can have a picnic!


Alison Blenkinsop  Spring 2020